Week of July 25th, 2021: Dream’s Call

Soundcloud link: https://soundcloud.com/wizardofwestmarch/dreams-call

Ideas are like breathing: everyone does it without really thinking about it until you really need that one breath, that one idea. Then you start to suffocate.

That’s how it has felt a lot, these last few weeks. Ideas hiding, struggling to creatively breathe. But as I dove into the thoughts and ideas, and why it felt so crushing, I remembered something important. Dreams and aspirations are things to inspire, not things that should destroy.

And yet.

And yet more than once I have let my doubt over my writing, my coding, and other things I associate as creative endeavors tied to my sense of self lead to emotional damage, much of which was slow to heal, if it healed at all. This is an easy mistake to make. Attaching self-worth and meaning to accomplishments, when all work, all effort, is only part of the equation. It ignores the influence of the rest of the world. Perhaps the created thing was wrong time, or maybe you simply never found the right audience.

None of that devalues the work, but it feels like it can. Because if the goal is not achieved, the taste of failure can overwhelm everything else. Not that we should trust those feelings. Those feelings like to lie to us.

And yet.

This poem is my exploration of the inspiration of a dream, the chasing of the dream, and finally the crash and burn that comes when it never reaches fruition.

Chase your dreams, be inspired, love the sense of adventure daring something new and vital brings. But never mistake those things for validation. True validation comes from within, and also being at one with humanity. Kindness and hope, sharing and joy. Both is likely healthiest, but start with the self. And breathe.

Because you deserve it.

And yet.

Dream’s Call

That moment of divine inspiration
can chase you from your path
because you feel that soul deep call
while ignoring the hidden catch
that always comes to call

Your dreams should be cleansing
the way the wind scatters debris
instead of leaving you quivering
fearing the thunder’s roaring glee

The grind can feel ever so good
while the tears stain your sheets
as you dive in deeper and deeper
because this life is for keeps
and you felt the fateful call

Your dreams should be cleansing
the way the wind scatters debris
instead of leaving you quivering
fearing the thunder’s roaring glee

Nothing seems to be working
while chasing that fateful thrill
that never should’ve left you hanging
when you gave up what you built
to accept that cursed call

Your dreams should be cleansing
the way the wind scatters debris
instead of leaving you quivering
fearing the thunder’s roaring glee

The end still feels like the start
you never meant to remember
even though everything circles
around your moment of surrender
to the weakness of the call

Your dreams should be cleansing
the way the wind scatters debris
instead of leaving you quivering
fearing the thunder’s roaring glee

Writer of code and fiction.